Andy was working and John was curfewed by 'er indoors in case of injury before his holiday next week, leaving Jason, Terry and David, fresh from his fortnight's holiday, for tonight's local loop. However, as has become the norm this year, David felt unable to participate (jet lag?) so the Dynamic Duo did it alone.

We started at Jason's and rode south through the Tyne Pedestrian Tunnel - easier with just two plus two bikes in the diddy lift. We followed the riverside through Jarrow and Hebburn along the Keelman's Way to Gateshead, bombed down the steps at the Millennium Bridge much to the surprise of the startled pedestrians around, then over the bridge to the Quayside. As we'd made pretty good progress with no stops, we decided to extend the run a little so rather than return along the northern bank of the Tyne to Jason's, we turned west through Newcastle Business Park and along Scotswood Road. We crossed Scotswood Bridge and headed back east on the south side behind the Metro Centre. Just as we got level with Andy's place of work Jason started behaving strangely. He began leaning right down with his nose almost on the handlebars. He did this for 50 metres or so, up and down like a noddy dog. Pretty close to the truth, as it happens, because some soddy dog had left him a present.

Here's Jason giving his Coiler the evil eye - why?    Well here's a shot of his handlebars, close-up.   Guess what the strange little brown stickum is! Yep, he smelled it before he saw it and naturally chose to recoil from the Coiler. There was another tiny dollop of pooch perfume on the left hand rear of his seat post aswell. Good job we're in the habit of raising our saddles for roadie stuff, init? It must have been a single round fired off his back wheel, hitting the seatpost and splitting like a colliding planet. Somehow, the biggest chunk passed between the seatpost and his right leg, coming to rest where you see it above. Lucky shot, eh? Good old Gazzaloddi poop-scoops.

After cleaning the offensive growth off his bike we resumed our journey in failing light through Dunston Staithes and back to the Millennium Bridge for the second time. Over we went again, launching even harder down the steps in front of it just for amusement at the bewildered faces watching the two loonies performing. Over we went, but turning right (east) this time and weaving through the swaying drinkers outside the Quayside bars, and almost being speared by scaffold poles being unloaded from a truck for next week's Tall Ships event.   here's the temporary "mini-London Eye" being built for the Tall Ships Race event on the Gateshead side. Further along the Quayside towards Walker there's a sight for sore **ses.  Never seen such a long row of Portaloos - dozens of the things stretching a few hundred metres.

We got back to Jason's with his new computer showing 23.5 miles after one of the quickest rides ever, in terms of pace. Just got back before the light went too much.

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 Keep watching and if you fancy a ride out with us, drop us a line here: bailout@midaircrisis.org.uk