Today Andy had his brand noo Scott Scale 40 hardtail out, and very nice it is too in its blood red livery. He got this in a matter of weeks through the Government's Bike2Work scheme where you pay just over half the cost of a new bike if you agree to use it for work (ahem...). If you know nowt about the scheme, see here.

This must have been the only dry spot in the UK today, coz we could see all the wet spots everywhere you looked around us. By some miracle, or the effect of the hurricane blowing against us, the rain stayed away. If it had reached us, we would all be dead now, as we are all nearly dead anyway. Why? Because of the 20.1 miles of uncrossable BOG we had spent the last five hours trying to cross. As usual, I exaggerate, but only a little. We did have a spell on tarmac which wasn't a bog, just to give the tired legs a wee rest.

A look at the route map below will show you where we went, (start and end at point 581) but it can't portray just how hard it was getting around this "interesting" loop of our beloved Northumbria. It took us exactly one hour to cover the first five miles worth of hill and bog.

Gavin led the ride, assisted from about half way by another Reiver who's name I don't know. Unbelievably, in the light of recent happenings within their membership, this person deemed it unnecessary to wear a safety helmet. I just can't fathom this at all and perhaps should just shut up before I say something libellous. The vast majority of the Reivers, I must point out, seem perfectly sensible riders and do wear helmets.

Part way through the ride we had another encounter with a local bod who "advised" us it wasn't a good idea to ride across this particular farm, although we were, as usual, on a perfectly legal bridleway. There's ALWAYS one of these country-types lurking. On this occasion, the detour Gavin was unwillingly forced to lead us along was the Military Road. Now if you ain't been on this thing, you don't wanna go. ESPECIALLY not on a pushbike. It's absolutely lethal. Luckily we were on it only a few minutes until we reached another bridleway, and nobody was killed this time. We joined it at the Temple of Mithras and yes, I said a prayer to the Gods as we rode past the historic Roman Wall site.

here's Andy approaching the bridge where he made a right mess of himself. Ouch!

And one of the downhill bits where Golly and the Cuda were untouchable not (solely) through heroics, but really just to break the total monotony of the grind. And anyway, First Man Down is an idiot, as he can wait a long time for Last Man Down to get there and have a rest!

Next pic shows the deceptively steep, mud-ridden, storm-battered few miles eastwards (wind directly in our faces) we'd just covered up to the food halt.

The day continued much as before, with the stop for lunch behind this protecting dry stone wall. It's a wonder it didn't blow over on top of us. John tried launching his banana skin over it but it boomeranged and sailed off in the direction of Whitley Bay! Here it was that Golly removed two links from his new chain on the Barracuda after it started slipping violently on the middle chainring, but it made no difference, so he was back to big ring again while the others spun their legs merrily in the granny ring to scale the sodden heights of this God-forsaken route. Next adventure was to put a foot down in smelly bog water that came over the top of my Sealskinz socks - yuk. There were a few wet feet this day.

We regroup and pose at the turning point Here we wait for stragglers before one of the few decent down slope tracks

Jason checks the plants have enough nourishment While Gavin consults the group to see who wants to finish the ride in the fields or on tarmac. Tarmac won (universally!!!) Then it was the usual case of the Reivers racing each other back to the cars to ask "why did I race back to the cars?" We toured along some way behind most of them, and didn't even notice poor Andy having a total flatty after he'd blown up his back tyre at about half distance! He limped into the lay-by on his new rim! Thought it was unusual for him to be behind the rest of us...

Dirty bikes Andy's new Scott Scale 40 on Gollymobile

I sympathise with Gavin and Dave H for their crusade to keep bridleways open and available to the public, but today, as with so many other Reivers rides, the state of the ground meant that we were making a real mess of the softer parts. Normally I prefer to blame horses, and on firmer ground they do make a mess that we tend to level down again, but not on sponge like today. Now that gets Mountain Biking a bad name and my own crusade involves trying to avoid just that. So I'll never find it acceptable to ride over ground so boggy. We should either ride somewhere sensible or wait for fairer weather before crossing meadows like these. Have I finished? Anyway, more great exercise for the thirteen of us taking part.

The Gollum GPS said 20.2 miles in 4hrs 51 minutes max speed 36.2 (tarmac section, obviously!). Computer said 20.0 miles in 3hrs rolling time max speed 36.0mph, average 6.0mph. For some reason I have no elevation data so can't show you the profile, but believe me it went UP more than in the other direction. Strange, that.

Have you Killed A BIKE THIEF TODAY?