Four only for this ride on Sunday 18th November 2007 as winter and family ties keep the NMBC brigade away from their beloved bikes. It was about minus twenty as Terry H arrived at Golly's to reveal his ride for the day - a touch of vorsprung whatever in the shape of a Fusion Floyd. Yep, from the country that gave the world the  Messerschmitt three wheeler car and Oompah bands, Terry produced this masterpiece of German MTB engineering, giving it a trial ride from his local bike shop at the coast. Lovely looking thing, very stout back end, super front Reba forks and hardly any kilograms to speak of. Only drawback seemed to be the position of the Fox Float R rear shock. More later. Next to arrive was Paul C, already half knackered after a sprint from South Gosforth. We gave it until 9.05 and left.

Hold that thought - I've just turned around from watching The Prick, aka Jeremy Clarkson on Top Gear make a brilliant arse of himself, and he doesn't even realise it. Again. Why this time? They had the Kid driving a Bugatti supercar at 200mph along a runway, racing a plane. The plane had to do a mile vertically while the car did a flat one (obviously), both turning at their half way points. The plane just crossed the finish line ahead of the car, but not by much. The scene then switched to the studio with the usual piss-take by JC on the young 'un for losing. Then he introduced the plane's pilot, in full Firefox battledress, to the audience, and teased him with a typically stupid question, but didn't let him answer and ended the show! What a peasant! This big daft fat prat just ain't got a clue what a pilot has to be able to do to drive and manoeuvre his weapon compared to what any New York Bronx six-year-old misfit can do in a poxy automobile. Sorry, he just gets to me.

Ah, that's better.

Oh, back to the plot. Off we trotted in the GollyMobile to collect Derek from Cramlington on the way north then west to Harwood Forest out beyond Morpeth. What a damp morning it was. At least it was a no-brainer as far as what to wear goes, and we were all waterproofed from head to toe. As I write I don't have our GPS track available, as Derek's batteries went flat half way in so I'm waiting for Paul to send me his. Poor Paul. When we emerged from the car it was 4 degrees, and that's way lower than a Taiwanese body was designed for, so he was jumping up and down like a Nissan employee to try and keep his blood flowing while we got ready to go.

So we went. Terry H and Derek are both past visitors to this area so Paul and I were happy to follow them wherever they happened to point us. A preponderance of fireroad may seem a bit boring but on a dark grey, miserable-looking, arctic autumn morning the rises and falls broke the ride up nicely, as did the views when we got out of the trees. Approaching Winter's Gibbet on the Elsdon to Harwood road alongside the forest Derek decided that his new chain was perhaps a foot too long, so set about shortening it. Paul started hopping up and down again. No wonder they erected a 70 metre high wind monitoring mast here!

 

Little vid of Derek's chain arriving soon - but don't get too excited! And, if you can hear the sound track you'll find the Two terry's making arses of themselves aswell, with some dodgy advice to Del Boy, which he rightly ignored!

vid 1 - duff advice!          vid 2 - Derek's right           vid 3 - road drop          vid 4 - Terry on Floyd

Up to the Gibbet to get a few photos for Paul, who's keen to see as much of the area's history as he can on our rides.

 

Very tempted to doctor the Gibbet photo, but Paul's wife might see it.

 

Getting off the tarmac after the drop shown in a short vid here, the trail got a bit wetter, and the short climbs a little sharper as we headed to half way. What a difference wet weather clothing makes to your general comfort, great to keep a dry posterior for once. And for a flat, boring ride, it was about to be ignited as we hit the final section of fast, stony dual track before our lunch halt in a very accommodating and immaculate wood hut. Terry H, who was already impressed with the handling, ride, performance, weight and finish of the Fusion said it was great on this rough stretch. Earlier he and Gollum had given it a steep rocky chute test and it certainly felt stable and smooth there. The only bad thing TH had to say about it was the pricing, which is just a bit OTT for the finishing kit, although I hope Terry's checked their web site coz I found this at 2,000 Euro, not Quid, as he suspected, making it a very nice deal.

here's terry and Paul re-taking their Cycling Proficiency Test while derek does a Gollum and pi$$es on a Specialized

After a nice rest with wet coats hung up to drip we prepared to face the icy blast outside again. Over Rothbury in the distance it looked quite fair, but we were about to hit heavy mist as we began to backtrack on our return leg, again all on fireroad but at least no tarmac or bog to face. Because of the conditions, mainly the cold with everyone's feet and a few fingers frozen, Derek kept the ride to very sensible proportions and we were back at the car at 2.00pm. After  a casual reload of the bikes and stripping of dirty riding gear we made it back to Toonsville shortly after 3.00pm and Paul's bike PC had clocked about 23 miles. More detail will follow, with vidz.

Here's our favourite snoozer, back to normal in the cosiness of the GollyMobile

Oh, I said I'd say more about the Fusion's Fox Float R rear shock, didn't I? Well, nowt at all wrong with the thing and it was supplying Terry with a buttery smooth ride and no detectable pedal bob. But imagine you're the back wheel - this is your view of what's ahead:

Yep, and we saw it plainly being swamped, and I mean swamped with water and crap from the tyre as Terry rode along. Bit more thought needed from the Knockwurst eaters, I think. As well as Audis, the Hindenburg was also one of theirs...

 

Keep watching and if you fancy a ride out with us, drop us a line here: bailout@midaircrisis.org.uk