Thursday 22nd November 2007. A pretty cool night on North Tyneside as Terry H, Keith and Craig arrived at the Cave ahead of the 7.00pm start time. And loads to talk about - Terry looks like he may be buying that cracking Fusion Floyd he was on last Sunday after being given an extremely favourable deal on it. He's just waiting to give it a thrash on the lumps at Kielder this weekend to see if it stays the pace. I'm sure it will. Keith arrived and immediately turned his (yuk) Specialized Stumpy upside down (they're probably as good as any bike in that position) and raided Gollum's tyre store after he shredded the rear on glass going to work midweek. Then all eyes switched to the back of Craig's van when he pulled up to see the anticipated first appearance of his new (yuk) Specialized Stumpy, built up with bits from his retired (yuk) Specialized Rockhopper hardtail. It looked great in its bright red livery, no, not like a Ferrari, and Craig delved into the Cave for a shock pump to re-inflate the flattened Fox Septune on the back of it. A few minutes were spent trying to set the sag properly then we four were off to see who else had come out to play on this very windy but once again great looking evening.

We got as far as the Metro Station on the Great Lime Road when Speedian appeared on his ownsome. No Derek? Strange, will ring him later thinks Gollum. And apologies to Derek for not doing that, but it was too cold and we were moving too fast to use a mobe. This ride will be memorable for two things. First of all, Keith still had his shorts on. What a hero. And secondly, it was a real treat to watch Craig getting used to his first full susser. He just couldn't leave the shock alone, riding into hedges and parked skips as he crouched alongside the shock tweaking it as he rode - click, click, click. But hey, how else do you discover the best settings?

Forever looking for variations in these rides, tonight we took Ian's advice and rode along to Holystone farm, then up through the fields to the edge of Killingworth and onto the Waggonway to Hillheads Farm. Across the road there led by Terry H and under the A19 to Backworth. The other Terry then grabbed front slot and led down on tarmac towards Seghill. Half way down Terry 2 took over at the front, generously acting as wind stopper, until Craig did the same at three quarters. Unfortunately the extra speed he was generating from having a rear spring took him too far past us to be any use - definitely not Tour de France standard. Ian and Keith stayed in relaxed mode a bit further back.

Once into Seghill the Gollum directed the party at a (err, anyone looking?) footpath through what looked and felt like a mini jungle, just to make this ride a bit different. The biggest obstacle in the first hundred metres wasn't the overhanging spiky greenery, but the flooded stream we had to cross. In reasonable weather there are stepping stones to make it easy. In the dark and with a raging torrent flowing after days of rain the stones are submerged a few inches, as well as being slippery and, well, dangerous. With no intention of showing weakness by retreating and finding another way around, Gollum braved the flood and using the Decathlon as a prop, carefully tiptoed his pit boots across the angry, dark water. Fortunately his headlamp picked out the stones pretty well, and when he made it to the other side he tried to be helpful to the others by shining it down on them. Blinding them. Ooops. Keith became the only victim here. Although he was wearing his pixie boot overshoes, the socks under them were of the normal everyday type, so he got very wet. And very cold.

Ideally, when this happens you pedal like Hell to get warmed up again. Only the stream was just the beginning, and there was more Hell ahead. This came in the shape of gorse and bramble. Terry H and Craig had scampered away through this lot by the time we got away behind Keith, but they left all manner of traps in our way as we tried to duck and dive between vicious prickles and rabbit holes, one of which caught a Golly foot when he stopped to avoid Ian's back wheel when he stopped to avoid Keith's! This morning I've got cuts all over the lower limbs of the GollyBod™ where the bushes tore right through my waterproofs and normal leggings underneath. Keith wasn't so lucky. Ouch.

After another session with Gollum's shock pump we took to the bridleways north of Seghill, trekking past the Mummy then through the fields again to the top of Seaton Delaval. From there we took the New Hartley road before turning off left/north for the glorious, never-ending under-tree run up to Newsham. The Gollum managed to get everyone trapped in one of those famous dead ends again with nothing but a railway track and CCTV cameras ahead, so we turned back and headed towards Blyth town centre on the roads.

Once on the sea front we were a bit lucky to get the changing wind behind us making it a very easy cruise southwards along the dune trail to Holywell. We stayed on the coastal path past St Mary's Lighthouse and rattled down the edge of the golf course onto the promenade.

Terry left us for home at Cullercoats at the Leisure Pool, where we turned into a side wind up Monkseaton Drive with Craig disappearing into the distance, finding our pace a bit too casual. We stayed on tarmac the rest of the way past Wellfield Estate and Earsdon through Shiremoor and home. At the Cave Speedian's bike pc said 24 miles in 3 fairly tiring hours. Keith was so glad to be just a few miles from a pair of dry socks, and even more delighted and grateful when Super Craig invited him and Ian to take a ride home in his van. Lovely gesture from Craig who lives in the opposite direction to these two, cheers.

Once more - where were YOU? 

Keep watching and if you fancy a ride out with us, drop us a line here: bailout@midaircrisis.org.uk